If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
