So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize