Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
