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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  "must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.

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• (408): View more from California

  that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.

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• (310): View more from California

  She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.

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• (44): View more from United Kingdom

  You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.

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• (409): View more from Texas

  Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.

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