I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
She bit a glass in half.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
