he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
