i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
