I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
