you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
