Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
dude. I can hear the air.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
