I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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