so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
