I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Blood and glitter go together right?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
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