I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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