You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize