Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Randomize
