Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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