I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize