worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
