I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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