Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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