i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
