he puts the penis in happiness.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
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