They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize