Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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