if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
