I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I wear drunk well.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize