How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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