My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
