i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
They left me at home... I'm a liability
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
