I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize