The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
