Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
You're a waste of cheezeits
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
