Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
How naked do you want me to be?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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