that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
