You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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