did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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