Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less

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(586): View more from Michigan

Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...

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(317): View more from Indiana

i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.

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(678): View more from Georgia

I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.

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(415): View more from California

When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"

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(501): View more from Arkansas

I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels

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(303): View more from Colorado

I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations

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