So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
i need some magic done to my vagina
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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