Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
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