i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
