Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
