He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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