totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
