okay pat passed out under dana's car
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
