God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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