If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
