yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
