If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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