You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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